Fyonna Fortesque
22/08/11 09:39
| The Indonesian for 'No' … |
It is sometimes easy to overlook the difficulties in communication when you travel to Asia. Besides the obvious differences in language, real meaning and intention are often veiled behind understatement and double-entendre. And I don't mean that in the Benny Hill sense, like "oi, 'as anyone seen me melons?" or "can I carry those jugs for you, waitress?"
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Undeterred, we sat around drinking cask wine with a contented group of middle-agers which was dominated by Fyonna Fortesque-Smythe or something or other. She was one of those posh English women whose accent was so plum and la-di-da that she had lost the ability to pronounce the letters "r" and "l". I'm sure you know the type. She heard we were going to Ujung Kolong.
"You'd better be carefuw. I hope you've had your tabwets. It weawwy is a dweadful mawahwia awia."
"A what?", we sniggered.
"A mawahwia awia. It weawwy is quite dweadful."
"Sorry?" we chortled.
"A mawahwia awea! It's a bwoody tewwible mawahwia awea!" she cried as we collapsed into howls of laughter.
My mother always told me I should listen to people who know better than me. In the first place, I should have listened to my mother. If I had, I would have listened to Jasper and perhaps even Ffyonna. But I didn't, so I didn't. So we got up early the next morning and began our trek into the dreaded malaria area, unprotected.
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